I’m trying to find the balance of being excited for the possibilities and being extremely worried for what could happen. The egg retrieval went well. The nurses were very helpful and super sweet. The doctor said that the eggs they did retrieve looked great…they got 7.
Seven was not what I was expecting…I was expecting more.
I kept hope alive for the days leading up to the to egg retrieval and I had hoped that on the day of the retrieval they would be able to get at least 10. I am not sure why, but 10 is the number I would be ok with. That’s the thing with IVF..you can’t go in with expectations, because that is just not how it works.
I spoke with the embryologist yesterday and learned that 5 embryos fertilized. FIVE. I won’t get another report until Saturday, because they don’t like to check on the embryos more than they have to. I learned from her that usually half make it to the blastocyst stage, so we can expect 2.5 to make it to saturday. (Hopefully it’s a +.5 and I end up with 3) Then we still have to do the chromosome testing and normally 60% come back with no chromosome issues. The numbers keep dwindling with each day..each step. The numbers break my heart. All I can do is wait until Saturday and see how many make it to day 5.
Per the usual my husband is staying optimistic and keeps repeating that it only takes one. Yes, it only takes one, but I want a family. I feel a bit defeated at the moment. I feel defeated that my numbers weren’t higher. I feel defeated that to have a family I may have to go through this experience again.
I am trying to remain positive and realize that I am so lucky to have at least 5 fertilized. I just need Saturday to hurry up and get here.