For the first time in months I feel at peace with everything that is going on around me. It started the morning of my transfer and has spilled over into this past week. I finally feel that it’s ok that I have no control over the situation and worrying about every little thing doesn’t help. I am able to go through the day without thinking about the next step. I am able to hold onto hope that this is going to work.
I don’t wake up anymore in a sheer panic about what the day will bring or what am I going to do if this all fails. I have a weird sense of calm that if my betas don’t bring me good news then at least I have two healthy embryos waiting for me. As soon as I found out both of those embryos were normal I was able to exhale all the stress and worry. I feel like I have a back up plan, if needed. For the first time in forever I feel that things could actually be going my way and it feels so good.
I hope that all you ladies are able to find a moment or two of zen during your journeys as well.