Home · infertility · IVF · miscarriage

Sharing my story

You guys, I’ve gone and done it. I’ve shared my first ever post on Facebook regarding my infertility.

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My hands are still shaking and my heart feels like it may jump out of my chest.

But, it also feels so liberating.

I didn’t wake up this morning with the intention of sharing personal information, but as the day went on and I read more about National Infertility Awareness Week I felt compelled to write something.

I felt that I was tired of dodging questions of why the hubby and I don’t have kids yet and tired of coming up with witty responses. And, so I shared a snippet of my private life with my friends on Facebook.

In the post I didn’t go into detail about my failed IVF cycle or my multiple losses as I still want some things to be private, but I did let others in on my secret of infertility.

The one thing I did forget to do was let my hubby in on the fact that I just posted something quite monumental on Facebook….oops. Oh well, I guess his family now knows our secret. Sorry hubby!

If you haven’t shared your story with others I encourage you to do so. It is the scariest thing you will do and you may second guess yourself for a few minutes, but as you see the supportive and sweet comments roll in you will forget the fear and feel the love.

On instagram you can join in on the #morethan1in8 movement and share your story. I wrote the following:

We are apart of this club that nobody wants to be in, the #morethan1in8 club. We never signed up for it or even knew it existed, but this is where our life has lead us.
Over the past 9 years the hubby and I have created some wonderful memories together….We traveled, we partied, we graduated college, got married, & danced away many nights….and, together we’ve had hard times….his medical discharge from the USMC & transition to civilian life & the loss of loved ones.
But, nothing could have prepared us for how hard these past 3 years have been and how hard it is to loose 6 babies. Through this we have learned how to grieve together and how to support one another. It’s not always pretty, but together we make it work. I’m so grateful to have this man by my side and to have connected with so many strong and supportive women who understand the struggle of infertility and pregnancy loss.

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The hubby and I through the years.

FOLLOW UP…

 I finally had my consult with Dr. Kwak-Kim yesterday. I am working on what to write as there is so much information and decisions that need to be made. So keep posted.

xo

 

22 thoughts on “Sharing my story

  1. Good for you – I know it’s hard to share but if only to stop (some of) the stupid comments and questions it can be worth it…and for me, I’ve found so many other women who went through it in my own network that I never would have known about hadn’t I shared it myself.

    BTW what does #1-17 mean?

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    1. Thank you! Yes, it does feel very freeing and like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I’m sorta nervous about running into people now that I’ve posted about my struggles, but I’m happy I did it. Xo

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    1. Thank you, the support has been overwhelming and some people even responded that they had no idea some of those comments were so incentive, it is truly amazing how people really just don’t know how to react to infertility. So its nice to help everyone see the light. xo

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  2. Well done you! You are way braver than me. I still hope that one day I can post one of those “We are having a baby after X years and Y losses” pregnancy announcements. Until then, I just don’t think I could cope with the fallout that a post like that would take. I actually find sympathy and stupid responses worse than people’s ignorance! I think you are awesome for doing this! X

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    1. Well, I have to admit I am now going to hide from everyone on my FB for a few weeks as I don’t want to actually see anyone or talk about it, ha. But, it does feel very good to have it out in the open. Like you, I had always dreamed of not sharing until I had my pregnancy announcement, but I am just so over people asking when, that I just had to share. xo

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      1. Do people ask you a lot? It drives me crazy when people ask us in a social setting whether we want kids, or whether we have any plans for kids. I usually just say “Not yet” because I don’t want to rock the boat. One day I’m going to tell them the truth and hope it shuts them up!

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        1. Yes, people ask all the time. I’ve been married almost 6 years now and everyone I know is having babies and people at the grocery store or at parties are always inquiring. I usually just brush it off and say we are working on it or something witty, but I just got to my wits end with the constant flow of questions.

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          1. Argh! The perils of being married! I used to say that I got married because I wanted to be with my partner, not to have kids. But people do automatically assume you’re going to have kids if you get married. I think it’s nuts that people still think it’s okay to ask. Chances are if you don’t have kids, it’s quite likely you are trying. (I realise not everyone does… But I do think most people do. And it would be sensitive not to force people to discuss it if they haven’t brought it up.)

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  3. Good for you dear! I can imagine how much you are shaking, I am shaking just thinking about it. You are very strong to share something so personal, but people need to hear it. Thank you for your courage on behalf of myself, who is still too scared to speak up. Maybe someday.

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